Doctors Recommendations

Per my doctor’s recommendations, I got one of those Fitbits. It says you can even swim with it on, which has me really stoked because I never could swim before…

 

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l

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It’s Been a Pickle of a Day

 

If a cow and a half can eat a bale and a half in a day in a half, how long would it take a rubber mosquito with wooden legs to kick the dimples of a pickle?

And that perfectly sums up my day!

 

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l

I Just Didn’t Know…

And today’s conversation in question…

User: “Should these groups show on the Groups by Date report?”

Me: “The report pulls groups who are active today. If they’re not active, then no. If you run it for 01/01/2018 they will show up.”

User: “Oh, I did that and it worked. I found the groups. I just didn’t know if there was something wrong with the report and it needed to be fixed.”

The report worked the way it was designed but…”I just didn’t know if there was something wrong with it….”

I’m leaning toward it being a PEBKAC issue. What do you think?

 

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l

Just Call Me ‘The Machine’

I love the receptionist we have at work. She is the brightest part of my mornings. She does, however, get the most unusual calls. Case in point:

Receptionist:Thank you for calling our company. How may I help you?”

Today’s Caller: “Hello. Are you an answering machine?”

Receptionist: “An answering machine?” 

Today’s Caller: “No, not a machine.”

Machines may be ruling the world but we still like the personal touch around here.  Machine on Regal Receptionist!!

 

robot.jpeg

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l

Didn’t Really Do Anything…

Seriousness is not a job requirement…even from the captain of the ship….

From: Hot Wheels Aficionado
Sent: Tuesday, April 2, 2019 2:08 PM
To: Customer Wise One; Me
Cc: President Extraordinaire
Subject: RE: ASAP Deadline: Report Needed

Thanks. Let me know or just CC me when/if you send it to Stacie.

Thanks All (Well, not President Extraordinaire. He didn’t really do anything!)

Hot Wheels Aficionado
Marketing Manager | Phone/Fax | Toll Free

 

From: President Extraordinaire
Sent: Tuesday, April 2, 2019 2:34 PM
To: Hot Wheels Aficionado ; Customer Wise One; Me
Subject: RE: ASAP Deadline: Report Needed

Correct…..and it will remain that way.

answers

 

 

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l

Programming Virgins

All in a days conversations…..

Me: “It looks like a crime scene in here….”

Boss: “All that is missing is the blood splatter…”

Me: “That can be arranged…”

Boss: “Well….who do you propose we sacrifice?”

Me: “Typically, a virgin….”

Boss: “Can you program that..?”

Me: “No, the code for that was broken long ago….”

I wonder if the new AI sex dolls are considered virginal until utilized….?

 

 

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l