Statement of the Day

Working along. Writing a query. Headphones on and I hear….

“When you’re done, you have to pull the rubber off. Just grab it at the top. It’s easier to remove that way; and less messy.”

The person then gets up and quietly walks away.

Please tell me I am not the only one who is questioning the contents of the rest of the conversation?

I almost…almost….want to ask who they were talking to…almost!

 

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l

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What’s for Lunch?

So…

Corvette-Crazy and Make-it-so-Mike have this thing. It’s a weird thing. They’re a weird thing.

Anyway…

They venture to lunch and when they come back….they try to guess where the other went for lunch. You wouldn’t think this would be entertaining but…

Corvette-Crazy keeps a stash of empty fast food bags in his vehicle. Let me say that again….He keeps a stash of Empty fast food bags in his vehicle.

Why does he keep this stash? So he can ‘stump’ Make-it-so-Mike. The daily lunch discussion goes exactly like this:

Corvette-Crazy: *Walks in with a bag of food and drink* “So, where did I go to lunch?”

Make-it-so-Mike: “I don’t know. I didn’t see the bag”

Corvette-Crazy: *Holds up bag so Make-it-so-Mike can see it*

FYI – the bag Corvette-Crazy holds up says Taco Johns.

Make-it-so-Mike: “Looks like Arby’s, or Sonics.”

Corvette-Crazy: “Is that your finally answer?”

Make-it-so-Mike: “I know you went Sonic’s. I can see the cup.”

Corvette-Crazy: “Is that the only place I went?”

Make-it-so-Mike: “Probably not.”

Make-it-so-Mike to Me: “You know he keeps a stash of empty bags in his car so he can switch them out, right?”

Me: “You’re kidding?”

Make-it-so-Mike: “Nope”

Corvette-Crazy to Mike: “I think she’s getting into this too.”

Me: “Keep thinking!”

I have the unfortunate luck to have my desk smack dab between these two.. Most days, it is a great place to be….until lunch rolls around.

I appreciate the ‘guys’ have their thing. It entertains them. It makes them happy. Happy co-workers are a good thing.

However….after a year of this lunch discussion… I DO NOT care what anyone has for lunch!

By the way, I had beef jerky and a Monster for lunch. I know you were wondering…

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l

Just Call Me ‘The Machine’

I love the receptionist we have at work. She is the brightest part of my mornings. She does, however, get the most unusual calls. Case in point:

Receptionist:Thank you for calling our company. How may I help you?”

Today’s Caller: “Hello. Are you an answering machine?”

Receptionist: “An answering machine?” 

Today’s Caller: “No, not a machine.”

Machines may be ruling the world but we still like the personal touch around here.  Machine on Regal Receptionist!!

 

robot.jpeg

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l

Extend Your Right Arm And…

When your Support Desk personnel are tired of fixing the same issue, repeatedly, every single day, but…they are trying to stay upbeat and positive to avoid jail time…. you end up with directions like this:

Periodically Internet Explorer will not display the  Home page (www.ourhomepage.com/homepage) correctly however there is a very simple fix!

If you open the Home Page and see something that looks like this image – follow the 6 steps outlined below:

homepage

  1. Relax – it’s easy to fix!
  2. Click on the “Sprocket” in the upper right corner of the browser

sprocket

3. Click Compatibility View Settings

compatability

4. Remove the Check in the box before “Display intranet sites in Compatibility View” and Click Close

checkmark

5. The browser should automatically refresh and …… Ala-ka-zam!!  You fixed it!! Your  Home Page aka Links Page should now look like this:

After

6. Now, fully extend your right arm, wrap it around your left shoulder and give yourself  a pat on the back – Good Job!!

If you read the full instructions…extend your right arm, wrap it around your left shoulder, and pat yourself on the back! You’ve just done more than the intended audience, Kudos!

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l

Brand Name vs. Generic

And today’s winning conversation….

Caller: “I have a question about my coverage.”

Receptionist: “Okay, let me get you over to customer service.”

Caller: “No, I only want to speak to a generic person.”

And Generic for the win! Brand Name is back on the benches. Maybe next round Brand Name will get its chance.

Makes you wonder….are you Brand Name, or Generic?

goofy

 

Yours Faithfully,
R3b3l G33k

R3b3l