Power Button Predicament

Today’s Adventure…

The Toni-ster: “Can you shut off the computer? Turn it completely off.”

User: “How do I do that?”

Toni-ster: “Hold the power button down for 30 seconds, or until the light goes off.”

User: “Okay, I held the button down, but there’s still a light on.”

Toni-ster: “Are you sure you turned the computer off, or was it the monitor?” *Toni-ster already knows the answer to this because she’s remoted in and the screen went blank…*

User: “Yes, it was the computer.” *You hear rattling of papers and things moving*

User: “Well,…maybe it was the monitor the blue light isn’t on any more.”

Toni-ster: “Okay, we need to turn the computer off. Find the power button on the computer.”

User: *More rumpling of papers, etc.* “Okay, I think I have it.”

Toni-ster: *Still seeing a blank screen…screen comes on…* “Are you sure you have the computer power button?”

User: “I think so, but I still see a light.”

Toni-ster: “The button should be on the little black box with the device name sticker.”

User: “Oh! That computer.”

Toni-ster: ….

User: *Holds the correct button down and turns off computer…finally!*

Toni-ster: *This is exactly why they made wine….*

Just another day in paradise! 🙂

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Schrodinger’s Application

Today’s adventure…

User: “I can’t get in to such-and-such application”

Me: “Okay, let’s take a look” I remote in and….user is on the main log in screen.

Me: “Oh, so do you need help logging in to the computer?”

User: “No, I have my information to do that…”

Me: ….waiting for user to log in.

User: “Do you want me to log in?”

Me: *Thinking to myself: “No, I need to work on my psychic ability to see what happens next.”*

Me: Saying politely, “Yes, please.”

User: Finally logs in and….

Me: “What application are you having problems accessing?”

User: “Well, I have my sign in information for this application, this application, this one, and also this one.”

Me: “Is it one of those applications you’re having problems with?”

User: “No, I haven’t signed in to it before.”

Me: “Is it one of the applications you access through Citrix?” Opens Citrix for user to sign in.
User: “No, but I will need to be able to sign in there.”

Me: Let’s user know what username/password will get him signed in to Citrix.

Me: “Is the application one of the icons on your desktop?”

User: “I’m not sure. It should be.”

Me: *Waits for user to click on icon…*

Me: “Which of these icons is the one you need?” *Hovers over each icon slowly…trying to remain calm*

User: “I don’t think it is any of those.”

Me: *Screams profanities in my head because I just want to know what application he can’t get into*

Me: “Do you know which application it is?”

User: “I think so-and-so is calling someone.”

Me: *Really wanting to ask, “what does that have to do with the application?” while also screaming inside my head.*

Me: “Oh, are they calling someone to find out what application?”

User: “I don’t know…maybe.”

Mysterious voice in the Background: “Users name, they need to install the application, but you have your log in information, right?”

User: “I think so. They gave me several.”

Disembodied voice again: “Well, what applications did they give you passwords for?”

User: “I’m not sure. There were several of them.”

Me: “Users name, it sounds like someone is helping you with the application in the background. Is there anything else I can do to help?”

User: “Ya, so-and-so is getting the information. I think we’re good.”

Me: “Okay, if you have any additional problems please let us know.”

Disembodied voice in the background: “Now, which application were you trying to log in to? You have it on your computer right, or do we need to install it?”

User: “I think it is on the computer but, it may need to be installed. I don’t know.”

Me: *hanging up the phone quickly, praying he doesn’t call back!*

I still have absolutely no idea what application he was trying to log in to. I’m not even sure there was an application…

Schrodinger’s application – it is both an application and not an application until it is found or not found.

New Job, New Year, New Me, New You?

A new year.

A new job.

A new perfectly profound personality pool.

Laughter will ensue…has ensued…will be suing… Okay, maybe not the last part, but you get the picture.

The new crew is vast, and ever changing, which means names will be changed to protect the far from innocent.

And we start the year with “Today’s Random Statement,”….

“I think I need a stronger vibrator…”

When said loudly, and with no prior context…or visual clues… would your first thought be about a cell phone? Ya, neither would ours.

Welcome to 2018!

Your Slip is Showing!

freud
Today’s subject: Freudian Slip

Freud·i·an slip
/ˌfroidēən ˈslip/
noun
an unintentional error regarded as revealing subconscious feelings.

Today’s Freudian Slip (Courtesy of Boss-type-lady):

“Have ‘Virgin’ Control take a look at it.”

…because Version Control is so last year!

scratchingYou have to wonder just where the Boss-type-ladies mind was…. and….why?

Was she Countess Elizabeth Bathory in a previous life? Nah…she’s no where evil enough but…she does look rather young….

Add the Meat, Remove the Stew?

To chili or not to chiliAnd the debate begins again…

Dan-chan happily announces, “I made some chili soup, with hamburger meat, last night.”

“Wait…chili isn’t a soup, it is a stew!”

“No…only when you add hamburger does it become a stew.”

“That can’t be true…stew is stew and soup is sloppy.”

“So…without hamburger chili is only a soup?”

“No, chili is always a stew. Unless it is runny, then it’s just ruined.”

“What about beef stew with hamburger meat?”

“And, why do you say hamburger meat, when everyone knows hamburger IS meat? ”

“Do you say chicken meat, or steak meat?”

“Well…no!”

“Then hamburger is just hamburger, and chicken is just chicken, and it is all meat in the end….or out the end, depending on the spices.”

“The portal is down again. Think anyone knows yet?”

“I don’t know. Did you report it?”

And once again, work interferes with the stew meat debate. Until next time, stew on my friends, stew on!

 

Tinder-ly Tied Up

Work, is for working, or so I’ve been told.

Today, however, was a Tinder moment…at least for Dan-chan. A fact I didn’t know when I walked away from my desk. If I had known I might have been prepared upon return.

Honestly though, nothing can prepare you for the question of, “What’s a Dom?” This is especially true when your focus is not spilling your coffee.

Now, I would expect to be asked about client issues. Maybe even asked about plans for the holidays, or the office holiday party. I would even be prepared to answer a question on hair, makeup, clothing, shoes, etc. Common themes you’d hear conversed about in an office. “What’s a Dom?,” does not rank in my ‘Causal Conversations’ list.

The root cause of this question was, of course, Tinder. Dan-chan had chanced across Brett, a Dom. At least that is what he had listed on his profile. The debate ensued as to whether to swipe right, or pass. The problem: No one could tell Daniella what Dom meant.

There is no way to have a conversation on BDSM without embarrassing some parties involved. And…to avoid potential visits from, or to, HR the solution was simple. I’m buying her a book! In the meantime she should probably say no to Brett.

I can’t wait to see what tomorrows question will be….

Is it Bright in Here?

Today we discuss Brightness…and Tea. matcha

Dan-chan, the youngest, again. Enjoys Matcha Green Tea. Nothing unique, or overly surprising there. Matcha tastes good and it is healthy. Add a little powdered Matcha to a smoothie and you have extra energy for the day. Simple. Effective. Tasty!

Well, maybe not so simple. You see, the directions on the package recommend keeping it in ‘a cool, dark place.’ We work in an office. That really should be simple enough. What else is a filing cabinet for, right?

Enter Dan-chan…and her statement of the day. This came right after she asked, “Guess where I put my Matcha?”

“I put it in the filing cabinet drawer, ’cause it said to keep in a cool, dark place. Oh, Wait! I have yellow folders in there. It may be two bright.”

No, no my dear, it isn’t too bright.